I am exploring Constantia Nek that rises above Cape Town, when I meet two very friendly Golden Retrievers and their master. We chat and walk together as the sun sets behind the mountains and the forest becomes darker and darker , my bare feet finding the way over streams and dark soft soil.
He tells me about his son. Six year old Rigel simply does not wish to get along with other little or big humans. I feel him challenged by his socially inept child and defending him simultaneously as cute and clever and so on.
I tell him there is no need to defend his little one. I feel the beauty of his child.
I ask questions. Rigel is conceived in a laboratory, without much presence or loving expectation of the father. The mother rejects him over the years and becomes resentful and hurt by the love between father and son and Rigel mostly spends his time with mother and grandmother.
When Rigel asks his dad why he should have to get on with humans he simple tells him so that he can survive. In this moment I immediately notice the father too has his struggles with humans and therefore it becomes difficult to teach the little one that which he still learns himself.
As the tale unfolds I feel the simplicity of the struggles at play. I explain to him that the masculine energy line is broken in the child and so his willingness to discipline absent. I speak into the ways of him bringing Rigel to deeper awareness of the masculine by taking him camping with his best friend and another father, showing the boy in the body how it is to get on with people, how it can be enjoyable and enriching and easy.
There is nothing wrong with the little one, nothing to contract from, just a need for some real masculine interaction and learning in the body and thereby showing him the joy to engage humans .. good learning for the father .. good learning for the son, the riddle comes to light and possibilities into new vision of living.
He tells me he has taken Rigel to many therapist for years and nobody has ever begun to suggest such things. I wonder how much money he has spent over the years and the many different specialists who do not seem to feel into this child at all.
In a moment, the tantric awareness sees so much , that others do not see no matter how much money is spent or time at the many “specialists ” .
And no, I will not get paid for this except that perhaps Rigel may have his life touched by this meeting.
And though I do not live so directly in the world anymore I still shop at Woolworths and use electricity and pay plane tickets. But so much of my work is offered in this way and so often seen as simply a friendly advice no need to pay her for her time, though so happy to spend money on that which has no intrinsic value or offers no real diagnosis or shift in the situation at hand.
It seems when people feel some real love and wisdom, they almost cannot bring themselves to pay for it. I am then seen as the mother who they never had or the sister or love itself. But I shall ask you now, if you have find yourself next to me in the forest, or having tea, or coming for a visit and you notice that I do affect you profoundly and offer wisdom into places that cannot be seen by others, please do ask for my bank details and make proper payment.
And I speak for myself but I also speak for the feminine wherever she appears, for she has been absent long and we do not recognise her work. We call her healing hands or a very good friend or a deeply spiritual woman but it is time for this work to be recognised and paid for.
I am honest and real and will not keep you coming back for more and more and more but take you directly into that which needs to be seen so that you can live and love again.
Please pay me and please pay her. The feminine work is core to what this planet is thirsty for right now and will only return if you say yes to her in all dimensions of beings.